Mum Life

The Perfect Mum : Good Enough Is Perfect Enough

The Perfect Mum : Good Enough Is Perfect Enough

The Perfect Mum – it’s something so many of us aspire to be. The Perfect Mum, The Super Mum – we seem to want it all. But why?

Pressure to be The Perfect Mum comes from many places : social media, magazines, television, and even friends and family.

Looking around at all these places the mum always looks well groomed, with a happy bouncy baby on her lap. If the baby is asleep it’s in the latest most expensive cot looking lovely in a clean white baby-grow. You can bet you’ll also find there’s a healthy/organic meal recipe that you can quickly whip up whilst your baby has their nap. 

Seeing all of this can and does have a massive influence on mums. We worry that if we’re anything less than The Perfect Mum – it means we have failed as a mother. Many mums are putting un-necessary pressure on themselves trying to achieve this, which can be a starting point for illness’s such as postpartum depression.

Being a Mum is not a competition! 

We all wish we could be The Perfect Mum. However lets be realistic here perfection is impossible to achieve – especially when you can’t remember the last time you’ve slept or brushed your teeth.

It doesn’t matter how many times I fail, my child with still love me unconditionally. No matter how many times I fail I will always be there back better and stronger because that is what mums do.

I’ll be damned if I’ll ever be perfect at mothering. What I will do is learn from my mistakes and I’ll get better at it with each fail – so I say ‘Good Enough’ is Perfect Enough.

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How To Be The Perfect Mum Starting NowSince becoming a Mum I’ve learnt that the dream and the reality are very different.

Organic pregnancy skincare

The Dream – The Perfect Mum

We all dream about how we’ll spend our days once our little bundle of joy arrives. You’re breastfeeding on demand and making home-made meals. The house is spotless. You’ve lost all the baby weight, have a full face of make-up and a new hair-do.

There is that hobby that always interested you so now seems the perfect time to take it up. On a daily basis you’re attending mummy and baby groups and offering to arrange new and exciting classes for the little ones.

Of course your having endless fun making puree. Plus you can’t wait to try out all those great food ideas you found for babies on Pinterest – who wouldn’t want to cut fruit up to look like a caterpillar?! 

Your little angel is wonderful and he/she is a baby that sleeps all night. You get that magical 8hrs sleep a night. So you’re always bright eyed and bushy tailed ready for the day ahead! Your little one never cries. They are looking clean in all of those beautiful outfits you brought.

They are as good as gold with everyone you meet. Plus getting them into a routine has been so easy, that they fit perfectly into your pre-baby routine. Perfect.

The Reality – The Good Enough Mum

You’ve bottle-fed the baby formula and you’ve been weaning them on baby jarred baby food. The house – lets not go there, make-up, hair, baby weight … you don’t have time to look after yourself!? You have no time for new hobbies, in fact you don’t have time for anything but taking care of your newborn.

On those rare occasions you actually make it to a baby group you look like a zombie. Your little sausage has left you looking like you belong in a scene of the Walking Dead. They’ve taken to a sleep pattern of 20 minutes asleep – 3 hours awake – 20 minutes asleep -3 hours awake! 

A ‘Perfect Mum’ has turned up to baby group, you’re really annoyed and angry with her and wishing that was you! She’s  looking immaculate and boasting about how well her little one sleeps (COW).

You are stood their with baby spit up and sick on your shoulder and slightly in your hair. The worst part is you didn’t even realised it had happened.

The days and night have turned into one and you’re not sure what month it is let alone what day it is – Mum Brain is real folks.

SLEEP? SLEEP!! A mythical concept for a new parent! You’ve tried everything from a dummy, lullabies, soothing music, that blinking dream sheep but nothing works.

I actually do not know how I have not lost my sanity through sleep deprivation. I’m pretty sure I was hallucinating at one point. Now I know why it’s used as a form of torture!

You Are Already The Perfect Mum

We’ve all been there its mid afternoon your still in your pj’s, your little one has been crying all day and your house is a bomb-site, your cup of tea is stone cold & you need the loo. Wouldn’t it be amazing if you had time time for a shower? You most definitely need to wash that sick from your hair. The house needs to have a good clean. You worry it looks like you can’t cope and that people will judge you.

But your little one is finally asleep – on you – so you dare not move… so there you stay looking at the mess, still in your pj’s, and you know what….Mummy It’s OK – You’re Doing Great!

Super Bestest Grandparent


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21 thoughts on “The Perfect Mum : Good Enough Is Perfect Enough

  1. I love this. I still remember (years ago) when my best friend got pregnant the first time. She swore she was never going to be “one of those mothers” whose kid’s socks didn’t match, or whose child cried at inopportune times. She was convinced she would always do everything right because as she said “she was prepared”!! Cut to about six months after she gave birth… I walked in to her apartment one day to find her sitting in the middle of the baby’s room, sobbing her dear heart out because she couldn’t find one of his shoes, convinced she was the world’s most terrible mother! Suffice it to say she was not! And by the time her second came along, she was /really/ prepared (and also not quite so convinced of perfection)!

    1. OneDizzyBee your friend sounds just like me hahaha! Everytime he got a bit dirty I’d change him so that people wouldn’t think I wasn’t looking after him properly – now if he’s got a slight bit of food on his t-shirt at lunch I’m ok – he’s not going to die from it lol! Plus he’s a 2 1/2 year old little boy now – he’s never going to be clean now! X

  2. Ah I remember these days fondly. My LO is almost FOUR! But I remember him finally falling asleep on me and relishing in the warmth of his snuggles. Make the most of them, because they soon grow up – and if you think your house is a mess now, wait until it’s covered with toys and other ‘childlike’ rubbish!! It’s all good 🙂 Lovely post #fartglitter

  3. Haha- totally. The standards dropped before we’d even left the hospital. Just now, when my tot is two I’m finally starting to catch up with a few of these points but stuff it, he’s alive and healthy.


  4. I’m not quite there yet (due in November) so what I’m imagining is still probably wide of the mark of reality, even though I’ve read lots of lovely reassuring posts like this! It’s good to know that when reality hits, I’m not alone and I’m doing ok 🙂 #justanotherlinky

  5. I’m expecting my second very soon as have the memories of my first…cluster feeding used to take over my night!! It will be fun and games with 2 but I’m not going to put too much pressure on myself! Great post xx #justanotherlinky

  6. its true theres always one well turned out mum.I always want to ask how they do it haha you learn to just roll with the punches. In time it all clicks into place again.

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